As our loved ones and we grow older, we must make many decisions and plans regarding health and living. It’s crucial to discuss these important topics with your loved ones and, if necessary, help them make choices for the future. We’ve asked several local professionals and want to share their valuable advice.

Choosing Care

Staying in the Home in Lincoln

Robbie Nathan with Care Consultants explained that one of the most common challenges facing families right now is “juggling the care of a loved one with your home life and your job.” Enlisting assistance from outside of the family can ensure that you are staying true to your commitments and providing quality care for your loved one. Robbie described the variety of services available at Care Consultants, and she said, “We provide everything from companionship to medical cares to hospice support. Families choose us because they’re given an opportunity to remain a big part of choosing care for their loved ones and they’ll be working with professionals. The family’s the boss and we adjust to their individual situations.” One way to begin this conversation with your aging loved one is to provide an example of someone you know who has received a little extra help and describe the impact it has made. Robbie also said that the most important thing you could do when helping your loved one to make decisions is to listen. She added, “Be patient and follow their lead.”

Amber Daw with ComForcare Home Care also understands the strains of providing care for a loved one. Amber explained, “Families are under a tremendous amount of pressure when their loved ones begin to age and show symptoms of aging. The stress can be caused from worrying their mother will fall and no one can call 911, parents forgetting to take medications, grandpa forgetting who they are or even the financial aspect of how to afford hiring help or moving that loved one into a facility. Many times, families don’t know where to turn and they are left feeling isolated and confused.

ComForcare provides a variety of services that can benefit seniors, individuals with disabilities and even new moms. We can help out around the house with chores, bill paying, cooking, and running errands. We can help people keep their independence longer by assisting with showering, toileting, medication reminders and getting around the house. We provide peace of mind to families with supervisory care and installing a Companion Service Unit for fall-risk individuals. We also provide a wide variety of resources to help you with whatever you need. The benefits of choosing ComForcare are the assurance that all caregivers are bonded and covered by liability insurance and workers compensation.”

Right at Home is another in-home care company that is available to answer questions as you search for in-home care for your loved ones. “Right at Home employees are strictly screened through a personality profile during the initial interview, which allows them to match caregivers with just the right client,” says Scott Neal of Right at Home.  “They also implement a caregiver tracking system called telephony, which monitors the arrival to and departure from a client’s home, which insures punctuality and promotes employee responsibility as well as giving you peace of mind when it comes to your loved one.”

Caring for the caregiver can also become an issue when one partner is bearing the burden of caring for the other. “It’s not uncommon to see the ‘healthy’ spouse decline when the other develops a medical issue,” said Kris Beckenbach, Director of Guardian Angels Homecare. “Helping a loved one in and out of bed or the assisting with a bath puts a strain on aging muscles. Having a professional caregiver come along side reduces risk of injury. Professional assistance with daily chores allows the spouse to remain healthy and enjoy time with their loved one.”

One issue that usually affects seniors who choose to stay in their home is health care.  When illness or mobility prevents them from making an office visit to their health care provider, you, the caretaker, often wonder what you should do. Thankfully, there are companies such as Health at Home Consultants, which specializes in home-based nurse practitioner care.  They make housecalls if your loved one is unable to be seen at their primary physician office for whatever reason.  The visit takes place in the home setting and after the housecall is made, they can either follow up with their regular physician or with Health at Home depending on their situation.

It’s important to also note that in-home caregiving does not only have to occur in the ‘home’.  These caregivers can also often visit patients in independent or assisted living communities to help them out with tasks the community may not offer and can often help them remain there longer instead of moving to a higher level of care.

Retirement Communities in Lincoln

Independent Living Communities

An independent living community is one made up of homes or apartments for those seniors who are still active and require a minimum of care.  Most offer amenities such as housekeeping, security, transportation, social programming and medical emergency response systems.  Many seniors who are able to stay in their homes opt instead to move to an Independent Living Community for the social aspect and so they no longer have to focus on tasks such as lawn care or home maintenance.

Assisted Living Communities

Assisted Living Communities are very similar to Independent Living Communities except they are higher on the scale of giving care.  Assisted Living is for those seniors who need help with day to day living tasks.

Nursing Care and Memory Care

Nursing and Memory Care are for those residents who cannot live on their own either due to medical issues (nursing care) or Alzheimer’s or dementia (memory care) and need constant supervision and medical care.  Some communities offer all of the above services, and therefore are a ‘continuum of care’.  This is an attractive option for many families as they know their loved one can stay in the same place even as they are or if their condition worsens.
Choosing the Right Community for Your Loved One

When choosing a community, Roxann Rogers Meyer of Immanuel Communities advises, “One of the most important considerations is matching the type of services and care necessary for the individual.  We encourage seniors and their families to plan ahead.  The earlier you explore your senior housing options, the more choices and control you will have over your future.  Researchers have found that seniors who move into a retirement community when they are healthy and independent will live five to seven years longer than if they wait until they have a health crisis.”  She adds, “At Immanuel communities, our primary goal is to educate seniors and their families on the secure and maintenance-free lifestyle.  We find that residents are pleasantly surprised at how much they enjoy the senior living lifestyle as they take advantage of our wellness programs, our exceptional dining and all the social events and lifelong learning opportunities.  An added bonus is the fellowship and new friendships that are forged. One of our newest residents was so busy with new friends and social activities that her daughter couldn’t find her in her apartment home when she came for visits.”

Obtaining referrals from trusted sources is often helpful when trying to decide on a retirement community, suggests Jay Bohlken of Legacy Retirement Communities.  “Many people have friends, relatives or neighbors who are either residing in a community or know someone who is.”  Asking people who have already been through this difficult decision-making process for their honest appraisal of the various options can be very helpful.

Karla Frese with Savannah Pines adds, “One of the most important factors in aging successfully is social connectivity. Living alone in one’s home often limits their socialization opportunities, which leads to faster decline. Those who live alone in their own homes must also cope with grocery shopping, home maintenance, cleaning, daily responsibilities, etc. At Savannah Pines, these items are all provided for or handled by the community. Socialization, security and peace of mind are important benefits of retirement communities such as Savannah Pines.  Socializing not only contributes to a longer, happier life, but it also improves cognitive performance. Of course, we all want to live longer while remaining healthy and alert. Adding a circle of new friends at Savannah Pines will help enrich your life in innumerable ways.”

Sara Engelhaupt of The Lexington comments, “Choosing the right community can be a difficult decision.  Each assisted living community offers something a little different, whether it may be in their services or amenities package or even simply how the community feels or smells when you walk in.  I highly recommend the children do their research.  Seek out communities in their area, call each one to find out a bit more and then narrow the selections down to a couple of facilities that they think may be a good fit for their parents.  A list of assisted living communities in Lincoln can be obtained from Aging Partners and they may be able to make a recommendation based on the individual’s needs and/financial status.  Tour each community and allow yourself enough time to get a true feel for the place.  Ask yourself “is this a place I would like to come to visit my parent?”  Check out all the amenities to see if there are things their parent may enjoy.  Such amenities may include, a wellness center, activity room, gaming room, etc.  Observe the staff on your tour – are they friendly, do they interact well with the residents, are they kind and courteous to you?  Talk to the residents while on your tour; ask them how they like living here.”

Looking into options early is also a good idea.  Roxann points out, “Over the last few years, Immanuel Communities has noticed that seniors and their families are waiting until they have a significant health issue before they being researching their options for senior housing.  In some situations, the senior no longer has the choice of independent living and their choices are limited to assisted living or memory support.  When this happens the family is very disappointed that their options are limited.”

Amy Fish with Gateway Senior Living advises those looking for a retirement community to not only look at the ‘perks’ and extras of a community, but also at the drawbacks.  For example, if your loved one’s condition worsens, will they have to be moved again or does the community, like Gateway Senior, offer a continuum of care so they can remain in their new home even if they need more assistance?

Help with Choosing

Sometimes it can seem overwhelming trying to decide why community is the best fit for your loved one.  In this case, Bridge to Better Living can come in and assist you.  Bridge to Better Living helps people of all ages choose a lifestyles community for themselves or their loved one by finding the right place that meets one’s needs physically, socially, financially and medically.  Services include comparing types of communities, features, location and amenities and scheduling appointments, providing transportation to the communities and helping to ask questions while there.  Their goal is to assist you before, during and after you have made your choice and can save you an enormous amount of time and stress.

Tabitha is another valuable resource for those caring for aging loved ones.  Tabitha offers a continuum on health and related services in 29 Nebraska counties. By making one call, individuals can inquire about independent living; services provided in your home such as hot noon meals, therapy and skilled nursing and hospice services; adult day services; rehabilitation; assisted living; long-term care in the traditional setting and long-term care in Green House® homes.  Eldonna Rayburn with Tabitha suggests, “When it comes to helping your senior loved ones make living plans, be proactive!  Consult with someone, such as a case manager from Tabitha, before the crisis hits. It is much less stressful and more advantageous to take the time and sit with your loved one and all family members to research the options. The Case Manager, by default, serves as an impartial, third-party that will advocate for your loved one. Often family members find it difficult to talk to their parents about these tough issues. A Case Manager has the experience to help with the discussion.”

Other Issues Facing Seniors

Hospice

None of us want to think about it, but there will come a time when you have to think of end-of-life issues for your senior loved one.  Fortunately, you do not have to do this all on your own. Hospice can be a comforting and helpful partner when having to deal with the stress, pain and other issues that come with death.  Curtis Klein of HoriSun Hospice says, “The HoriSun Hospice team collaborates and implements, in conjunction with Dr. Bob Bleicher who visit and evaluates our patients, a plan that provides the optimum in end of life services.  HoriSun  management has a combined hospice experience of over 70 years serving patients as a whole person (body, mind, and spirit) not just the disease, at this very critical time of their, and families life.  HoriSun is here to serve Lincoln and surrounding communities within a 60-70 mile range 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.”

Medicare

The process of researching and applying for Medicare can seem like a daunting task for many families. Health insurance advisor Bryan Oswald, LUTCF understands the stress that Medicare may cause and provides assistance. Bryan explained, “Most families face the challenge of not knowing where to go or who to talk to.  All of the literature seniors receive, along with the recent changes, makes it very difficult to understand the Medicare program.  Because of this, it is very important to meet with a trusted advisor who can explain all of your rights and options. The best advice I have is to get educated on your rights, options and entitlements. This can be difficult unless you have a credible educator to speak to who specializes in Medicare.  With the healthcare reform and the elimination of some plans, it is very important to understand your rights. Seniors not only need to be educated with all of the Medicare Supplement options, but first they need to understand how Medicare works!”

Bryan has served as that advisor to many seniors and has helped them to make Medicare choices that right for them. He explained, “As a credible educator, I assist concerned seniors and explain all of their options to them.  Since a lot of seniors cannot ever change their Medicare Supplement, it is crucial that they pick the best coverage and company at the beginning.” When helping a senior enroll in the Medicare program, Bryan advised, “The first step is to determine if they need to enroll in Medicare Part B or not.  If they continue to work and maintain their group insurance, they won’t need Medicare Part B.  Your local Social Security office can help with enrollment should they decide to enroll.” Bryan added, “Should someone decide to enroll in Medicare, they need to contact Social Security and complete the necessary paperwork.  Afterward, set up a time with a trusted advisor to explain their rights, options and entitlement with the Medicare program and see what Medicare Supplement will work the best for their situation.”

Amy Fish with Gateway Senior Living advised, “Make sure to have a conversation with your aging parents to see what they have in place.  What insurance policies do they have?  What retirement policies do they have in place?  Where do they bank?  Ask them so you’re not searching for accounts/policies if they become incapacitated.

Estate Planning

Attorney Christine Vanderford specializes in estate planning, estate settlement and elder law. She advises individuals who are helping their loved ones make such plans to “seek out qualified estate planning attorneys to review and/or create the necessary documents to anticipate an increase in need. Each person needs at least a last will and testament, and an advanced health care directive, which consists of a power of attorney for health care and a living will. It is also important for someone to have a Durable Power of Attorney so that the aging loved one has an agent appointed to help pay bills and carry out the loved one’s financial decisions.

“It is most important to discuss who will be making key decisions about health care: who will be responsible for helping carry out financial decisions and implement them, and who will be responsible to settle that loved one’s estate in the event of their passing.  The ‘who’ is just important as the ‘what.’  Having an understanding about what assets are going to be passed and to whom they will be passed is also important to decide.  It is also important to discuss how the beneficiaries (the person(s) receiving the assets) will receive those assets at the aging loved one’s death.  As you can see the issues involved in estate planning can get complicated fairly quickly.  The key is to find an experienced estate-planning attorney that will guide the aging loved one in making these decisions and keeping the process as simple as possible.”

When helping your loved one make financial decisions, it’s vitally important that you have the whole picture.  Amy Fish with Gateway Senior Living advises, “Make sure you know where your loved one banks, what insurance policies they have in place, what savings they have and where.  If you don’t know these things, not only will it hamper your ability to help them make decisions, but it could also become a nightmare if something happens to them and you have no idea where to look for their financial or insurance information.”

Funeral Planning

Funeral planning is a difficult step of planning an estate, but it presents another important need for a conversation with your aging loved ones.

Bryan Block with Butherus Maser and Love Funeral Home has more than 20 years of funeral home and cemetery management experience and provided great advice for how to make funeral-planning decisions with your family. Bryan said, “There are a number of ways to help.  If your parent or loved one is able to make these arrangements on their own, simply encourage them to proceed.  Often their driving force is to simply make things simple for their survivors, but they don’t want to upset you by discussing such things and need someone’s affirmation that it indeed is something that should be taken care of ahead of time.  If they are unable to make the arrangement or have transportation issues, we can certainly visit in the home or your assistance may mean doing some of the information gathering ahead of time and simply doing some of the footwork.  We encourage children to be a part of this process if they are available because it is best for everyone to know what has been decided and where those arrangements have been made.”

Mike Williams of Wyuka Funeral Home adds, “We believe the choice to honor your loved one with a funeral or memorial service is one made out of love, respect and consideration. A funeral service is really a way for a family and friends to say their last goodbyes. It offers a real way to accept the finality of death, to bring closure to one relationship and begin the journey of living through this significant change.  There are many decisions that need to be made during the hours and days that follow a death. Many times our funeral directors are looking into weary eyes during the arrangements conference. They then have to ask the family to make a multitude of decisions. Obviously, the premiere remedy is to have the decisions made ahead of time.”

He goes on to add, “Thoughtful preparation can offer peace of mind not only to the one making the plans but also to those left behind. Preplanning is also a practical gesture because it allows you to make unhurried, informed decisions. Preplanning compels you to organize important documents your survivors will need later. With advance planning, you can choose a reasonable budget, and even set aside the funds over a period of time, to ease the financial burden to your family.”

Hearing Issues

Dr. Sanda Miller of Associated Hearing states, “Your social and emotional health depending your ability to engage in meaningful conversation.  When hearing loss is present and is left untreated, the consequences include depression, anxiety, social withdrawal and insecurity.  It is important to establish a baseline hearing test by the age of 50 and utilize hearing protection when exposed to excessive noise.”  When it comes to your senior loved one, she advises you to take action early if hearing loss is identified.  “It’s important to be supportive and take part in the rehabilitation process.  The degree of success a patient has is often noticed and expressed by those who communicate with them most often,” says Sandra.  Associated Hearing provides services that educate individuals on the identification, prevention and rehabilitation of hearing loss.  As Doctors of Audiology, they have the education and expertise to provide a comprehensive solution for your loved one and they also offer daily emergency appointments and designated walk-in times to ensure they will available whenever a patient needs them.

Long-Term Care Insurance: An Issue for You

As you are assisting your loved one make living decisions, it just makes sense that you will begin thinking of your own retirement.  Perhaps you’ve watched as your parents spend their life savings on their long-term care or you’re feeling the squeeze as you help try to pay for it.  Seeing this should be a wake-up call for you as someday you may be in the same situation.  How will you pay for it?  Do you want your kids to have to take care of the financial burden?  What is the solution?  For many, the solution could be long-term care insurance.

Linda Robinson-Rutz of Union Agency says, “Long-term care insurance should be a part of everyone’s retirement planning.  We all want to think we will live a long, happy life through retirement, but the reality is that you or your spouse may need assistance ranging from moderate to full nursing care.  When you look at the cost of long-term care, it can have a significant impact on retirement assets.”

Depending on your age, you might be wondering if you are too young—or too old—to consider this type of insurance.  “It’s important for those in their 50s to begin educating themselves about the benefits of long term care insurance, what products are out there and how these products play in retirement,” says Robinson-Rutz.  “If you wait too long, you may not be insurable and costs continue to go up as you age.  If you wait until you are in your 70s or 80s, you may not be insurable or it may be cost prohibitive to purchase a plan such as this.”

No matter where you fall in the process of helping your aging loved ones make decisions, it is important to communicate openly about the future. Careful and informed planning, in addition to sensitivity and understanding, will ensure that your loved ones are taken care of and prepared for life’s unexpected turns.

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